Rihanna, Beyoncé, Amanda, Coco: RATCHET BRACKET – DAY 2

March 25, 2013 By:
Rihanna, Beyoncé, Amanda, Coco: RATCHET BRACKET – DAY 2

Ratchet, noun; a person (or activity) that is in general, over the top, out of control hood/ghetto, gritty, and unapologetically so.

According to UrbanDictionary.com, that is what a ratchet is. Obviously, names like Rihanna (unapologetic, natch) and Amanda Bynes (out of control), Beyoncé (over the top) and Coco (hood) come to mind.

Last week we brought you day 1 of our RATCHET BRACKET. It’s loosely inspired by March Madness and its basketball brackets, but since sports isn’t “our thing,” unless it’s Ryan Gosling playing Oscar Pistorius in a biopic, we turned OUR bracket into a ratchet bracket!

We’re sure most of you are just DYING to know who won DAY 1 in the bracket, so here it is. Miley Cyrus beat out Vanessa Hudgens as the most ratchet and Rita Ora trumped Kate Upton as the ratchet queen! Tomorrow Miley and Rita will go head-to-head! Hay!

But for today, we have Amanda Bynes versus Coco (you know, Ice-T’s wife) and Rihanna versus Beyoncé!

Amanda Bynes VS Coco: Okay, can we talk for a minute? Yeah? Okay good. Have you SEEN Amanda Bynes' new face? She has cheek piercings, wears a mallrat wig that she covers in a TRAPSTAR beanie (the ratchet official brand, basically) and started wearing frosted nude lip-gloss like she’s Fergie and it’s 2003. As for Coco, look at that photo up top! It’s a camo print monokini! Nobody wears monokinis except Kardashians and strippers! But unfortunately for Coco - Amanda Bynes is way more ratchet. Amanda is the winner in this round!

Beyoncé VS Rihanna: Oh the motherload of RATCHETS! Beyoncé owns gold hoop earrings that spell out the word "ratchet" and have you HEARD her new song “Bow Down?” Also, there are rumors that Beyoncé’s next single with Gaga will be called “Ratchet.” As for Rihanna, where do we start? All her Instagram photo captions involve the words “phuck” and “yo.” She wore TWO pairs of jeans to a fashion show and half of her photos involve nudity of some sort. From her badgalriri alter-ego to her timberland boots, Rihanna wins this round. Sorry, Queen B, you're just too classy to win this one.