Gwyneth Paltrow Tells Friends: Don’t Talk About Me

June 14, 2013 By:
Gwyneth Paltrow Tells Friends: Don’t Talk About Me
Image By:

Want to get into the perfectly immaculate world of Gwyneth Patlrow?

Where you don’t know what a pizza is unless it was imported straight from the south of Italy?

Where even Pottery Barn is still way too cheap for you sit on?

Where being her friend means not talking to Vanity Fair when they email you this weekend?

The New York Post is reporting that the actress is refusing to participate in a Vanity Fair cover story because of recent “unflattering pieces” the magazine published regarding her friends Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt.

A phantom source of the Post informed them that the editors will continue in Vanity Fair fashion with their Gwyn-centric story—“the magazine said it was going to proceed with the story without her”—but that she’s instructing all her friends and business associates to not engage with them. Gwyn told her friends they better not dare try to talk about her. 

In other words, if you want to keep being invited to her home in the Hamptons for nori sesame crunch appetizers and slow-cooked lamb tagine, you best not reply accordingly.