'Teen Mom' Star Gary Shirley Goes on 11-Hour Stripper Binge

August 12, 2011 By:
'Teen Mom' Star Gary Shirley Goes on 11-Hour Stripper Binge

MTV should just start paying this guy in one dollar bills. Because Gary Shirley blew a whopping $5,000 in one day when he partied at a strip club for eleven hours. I know it seems like a long time to be at a strip club, but keep in mind, it probably takes this guy few hours just to find his penis.

Gary visited a 24-hour strip club in Miami, where he kicked off the bender at 1a.m. It reportedly lasted until noon. He started in the VIP area, then moved into the champagne room.

Who is this guy, Charlie Sheen? It's nice to see that he's taking his Teen Mom money and using it for something useful. His daughter probably didn’t want to go to college anyway.

TMZ spoke to Shirley and he had no comment. Probably because he had a stripper in his mouth.

If you haven’t yet blocked it from your mind, you'll remember that Gary is the on/off boyfriend and baby daddy to Amber Portwood, the Teen Mom star who tried to kill herself.

If you've ever seen the show--and because you can read, I'm assuming that you haven't—the people MTV chooses aren't exactly the most responsible. After all, it's called Teen Mom. But Shirley and Portwood aren't the only ones with drama.

There's also Jenelle Evans, who has been arrested twice since appearing on the show. She was initially arrested after pleading guilty to possession of drug paraphernalia. She entered rehab the following month and was put on probation. She was arrested again on Monday for violating her probation. Evans tested positive for marijuana and opiates. She was reportedly jailed with a $10,000 bond, but she was eventually released. She tweeted: "I don’t know what the f-ck to do. The world is crashing down. No one gives a f-ck about me. Thanks a lot. Never coming back. Bye." I want to feel sorry for her, but I'm just impressed she got that much self-pity in less than 140 characters.

But Amber Portwood has had so much drama, she could have her own spinoff show. Oh god, do we really want to put that idea in MTV's head?

Portwood first had a run-in with child protective services, who were concerned about her daughter Leah's safety. Portwood punched the sh-t out of Shirley during an argument in which Leah was present. Months later, the police responded to a call from Gary Shirley to check on Portwood in her home. Apparently, she had tried to commit suicide and was then hospitalized.

Just another day in the life of a teen mom.