Protesters Want Ryan Gosling As Sexiest Man Alive

November 18, 2011 By:
Protesters Want Ryan Gosling As Sexiest Man Alive

They are the 99%. Well, the number might not that high, but Ryan Gosling is pretty darned cute.

Fifteen protestors wearing Ryan Gosling masks showed up in the rain outside People Magazine's headquarters at Manhattan's Time-Life building on Wednesday. Their cause? Convincing the mag to make Ryan Gosling the Sexiest Man Alive.

I guess these people got tired of fighting for economic equality. The issue of an uneven distribution of wealth is just not a sexy enough cause.

One man said: "We are devastated. [Gosling's] left arm alone makes him the Sexiest Man Alive. Hello, look at his abs!"

Facebook users started an entire page devoted to "The Pro-Gosling People Magazine Protest." There's an illustration of Cooper on this week's cover with a big red X over it. Gosling's photo is circled instead.

People's Executive Editor Liz Sporkin says, "We stand by our man! Bradley Cooper is the whole package. He's gorgeous, talented, brainy, loves his mom, can cook up a storm and speaks fluent French! Who can argue with that?"

15 protestors, that's who. I really want to see one of them get arrested.

Gosling is still featured in the mag, along with over a hundred other celebrity dudes.

A petition has even been started and thus far, it has 3,489 signatures. It reads:

"We believe People Magazine made a huge mistake by choosing Bradley Cooper as the 2011 Sexiest Man Alive. 2011 was clearly the year of Ryan Gosling and we demand that People Magazine give Ryan his own magazine cover. Together, we can right this wrong. THIS IS WHAT DEMOCRACY LOOKS LIKE."

I mean, if our Founding Fathers knew that Bradley Cooper would've beat out Ryan Gosling for Sexiest Man Alive, I don't think they'd have bothered establishing a government. The Constitution clearly states: "We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish that Ryan Gosling is the sexiest man alive. Hello, look at those abs!"

Gosling's Ides of March costar, George Clooney, joked that the actor thinks he was robbed.

"He really wants it," Clooney said at the premiere of The Descendants on Tuesday night. "He's been saying ... the whole time we were on the set of 'Ides of March,' he was like, 'How did you pull that off?' So I called up Brad Pitt and we worked with him for weeks on the walk, we told him how to train ... everything."