Rob Pattinson: I Am Playing Christian Grey

November 28, 2012 By:
Rob Pattinson: I Am Playing Christian Grey

What does every desperate housewife in the world want for Christmas? Robert Pattinson in their stocking, of course.

What’s just as good, if not better? Rob Pattinson as Christian Grey, duh…

In a recent MSN interview, Rob joked about the enterprise of taking on the role in the adaptation of Fifty Shades of Grey. But, seeing as the world is anxiously awaiting the casting decisions for Fifty Shades-gone-big screen with schoolgirl delight, we’ll read as much into the quote as possible…

Here it is:

“I am playing that part [Christian Grey]. I also wrote the book,” Rob said before bursting into a fit laughter. 

Now, avoiding the whole part where Rob is completely NOT serious in this quote, we can validate that for sure, definitely, without a shadow of doubt that Rob is confirmed for the role of Christian Grey. (Only, not really.)

Seeing as E. L. James’ novel is basically juiced-up Twilight fan fiction that replaced vampires with sex and the names Edward and Bella with “Christian” and “Ana” (yes, it’s that simple, people), it makes sense that fans would want to defy common sense and sentence context in order to transport the actors of the blood-sucking franchise to their erotic on-screen fantasies. Well, maybe minus the Kristen Stewart part…

After all, any Twihard-based list of “Men That Should Play Christian Grey” easily pins the English stallion at the top…

Not that casting Rob would avoid any drama in this estrogen-electric romance novel-turned-worldwide phenomenon.

Take this conversation that happened in the Hollyscoop office nearby while I was writing these very words:

Female Coworker # 1: “Oh my god, they’d be stupid not to cast him [Rob]… Except, he’s kind of awkward.”

Female Coworker #2: “I still think Ryan Gosling would be better…”

Female Coworker #1: “No…”

Female Coworker #2: “Are you kidding me? Ryan can go cold.”

As a dude, I don’t understand the extreme Fifty Shades powers at hand here, nor am I claiming to. I’m just telling you what I know, which isn’t much.

But, then again, I was the only one in the office not too distracted with Rob/Christian fantasies at the moment to get this out to you in a timely fashion, so believe what you want.