Is Katy Perry about to graduate from her teenage dream to one of motherhood?
According to a new report the songstress known for such shenanigans as spraying whipped cream on her breasts and parading on stage is apparently thinking about settling down with her on-again, off-again boyfriend, John Mayer.
Quoting a source, a publication called More magazine is reporting that the musical couple could be on the verge of starting a family together.
“John has given her the confidence to jump out of the rat race. With John, she feels like herself,” the source said.
According to the report, for Katy, that “jump out of the rat race” means quitting music for a bit, thinking like a mom and packing on the pounds like a squirrel before hibernation.
“She wants to nest,” the source added. “She's gained a few pounds, is taking a much-needed break from work and perhaps is even getting her mind and body ready for pregnancy.”
Ugh… While this story is almost completely unbelievable, it doesn’t even make sense. Getting her body ready for pregnancy? What does that even mean other than some freaky sex exercises that—frankly—I don’t want to know about?
The source continued:
“John really likes the fact that Katy is so independent and not needy and clingy like the other girls he's dated [ahem… Taylor Swift]. This is the first time John's felt so strongly about a girl. She's played her cards perfectly.”
Katy played her cards perfectly? What about John? Last I checked she was just voted the “Hottest Woman of 2013” by Men’s Health magazine and he couldn’t even carry a tune following his throat surgery.
If this is true, it’s John that should be thanking his lucky stars, not Katy. Who's with me?