Renee Zellweger
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But there’s nothing like the feeling of having your mistake completely erased from legal history. And one thing that has the power to do that is the infamous annulment. That’s why so many celebrities opt to annul their marriages instead of file for divorce.
The law might not remember them, but we still do. So without further adieu, here are seven infamous celebrity annulments.
Renee Zellweger & Kenny Chesney: They had a beautiful beachside wedding, but the marriage ended four months later. The couple released a statement saying the breakup was due to “the miscommunication of the objective of their marriage.”
The world wasn’t terribly surprised when Kim Kardashian announced her divorce to Kris Humphries on Monday morning.
After their $10 million dollar wedding, the two decided to try to work it out for a whole 72 days before they threw in the towel. That’s a hell of a lot of money for such a short wedding, but no worries, I’m sure E! will make it all back with the impending Kardashian Divorce Special.
This isn’t Kim’s first divorce rodeo, either. She was married to record producer Damon Thomas for four years. By Hollywood standards, that’s actually a reasonable amount of time.
But now, Kim will join the ranks of plenty of other celebs who divorced shortly after walking down the isle. Here are the shortest celebrity marriages of all time.
Elizabeth Taylor and Conrad Hilton: 7 Months: Yes, Elizabeth Taylor was married to a Hilton. Only 205 days after marrying Conrad “Nicky” Hilton, Taylor went through her first divorce. She told a California court that Hilton was “indifferent to me and used abusive language.”
George Clooney is essentially a life long bachelor. He's like that 27 year old guy that won’t move out of the frat house but because he's so attractive, it hasn't become a problem yet.
Even though Clooney is 50 years old, he never dates women older than 35, he only dates hotties, and when one of his revolving door of women utters the "M" word, he kicks them to the curb (or to the set of Dancing With The Stars).
So for all the men out there who aim to be an eternal bachelor like Clooney, what about the female players? Who are the ladies out there that we could easily call the-female-version-of-George-Clooney?
Drew Barrymore: Drew Barrymore has dated more men than Clooney's dated...
September 12, 2011
Cooper and newly single Jennifer Lopez were spotted together over the weekend in NYC having a “business meeting,” but with celebrities I feel like business meetings, dates, sex, and marriage are so intertwined, all of the above might’ve happened Saturday night, and Steven Soderbergh could’ve gotten a new flick out of it, only incidentally.
Bradley Cooper isn’t just the most wanted man in Hollywood. Women all over the world swoon over this man, and watching that video of him speaking French is probably the best sex a lot of women had. Yes, I know it was just a video. When Hollyscoop told Bradley he comes up as 'Hottest guy in Hollywood' under a google search he joked to us that his mom probably helped that term get on google. Aww. That’s the power of Bradley Cooper’s hotness.
So to celebrate the effect he has on women, we’re counting down the many loves of Bradley Cooper.
Jennifer Esposito:
March 25, 2011
Image by Splash News
“She seems to be handling the breakup well," says the witness. "She had a big smile on her face and a skip in her step!"
That wasn’t a “skip”, that was her tripping because she can’t see. Cooper was reportedly not home while she was there. He was likely hiding in a bush across the street waiting until the coast was clear.
An insider recently said: “She tried to make it work but in the end it was too hard.”
Insert Bradley Cooper penis joke here.
March 23, 2011
"Renee had to take a backseat," says the insider. "She traveled with him to make it work."
I don't find that too surprising, considering every photo of the two of them is Bradley walking away while Renee yells, "hey, wait up!".
According to another insider, Zellweger even moved to New York to be close to Bradley while he was working.
"She's accomplished a lot of her professional goals," says the source. "So Renee took some time out to be a great girlfriend and see if this is what it took to make a relationship work." The source continued, "She stopped fighting. It was just not working out."
Zellweger was seen visiting pal Sandra Bullock earlier this week, which I'm sure went something like this:
SANDRA: Awe, sweetie, don't cry.
RENEE: I'm not.
SANDRA: Oh, right. The face.
Image by Splash News
A friend of Zellweger’s told Popeater, “They were such a great couple that we are all shocked.”
They were a great couple. If that couple was a mother and son.
“She wanted a ring, and he just wasn't ready to propose”, the source says. “She's 41 and has an Oscar. She's starting to think about children and settling down while Bradley loves his life exactly as it is.”
So they split because Zellweger was ready to settle down, and Bradley didn’t want to be squinted at for the rest of his life. Mystery solved.
March 18, 2011
Image by Splash News
According to US Magazine, multiple sources have confirmed the break-up.
Why am I imagining the split to go something like this:
BRADLEY: I think we should see other people.
RENEE: I can’t see anyone. Literally. Is that you?
BRADLEY: Ok, I’ll be having sex with somebody else now.
The couple started dating in 2009, and have kept their relationship under wraps for the most part. In a recent interview on the Howard Stern Show, Cooper denied rumors of any engagement.
Reps for both parties declined to comment. And just when I came up with the perfect couple name for them: Rooper. Oh well, maybe we can use it if she starts dating Anderson Cooper. No? Fine, I'll work on one for Oprah and Gayle.
Image by wenn.com
“It was just something that happened,” he said.
Thanks for clearing that up, Cooper. “It was a thing. A thing that occurred.” Could you be any more vague?
“It’s interesting,” he continued. “Things happen!”
Ok, so apparently you can be more vague. When Stern asked him questions, Bradley might as well have just responded by smiling and nodding.
Cooper has been dating girlfriend Renee Zellweger for the past couple of years, for reasons that escape all of us. I’m not trying to be mean. I’m just saying, Bradley’s a great looking guy. It’s a shame he’s dating someone who can barely see him.
Cooper denies any rumors that he’s proposed to Zellweger, but says it’s untrue that his marriage to Esposito turned him off to marriage for good.
“Making any declarative statement [like that] is a joke,” Cooper told Stern.
March 12, 2011
Bradley, who unfortunately is dating Renee Zellweger, says women never ever try to chat him up. They will now!
When asked what women can do to get him attention, Bradley said: "I'm usually trying to catch their attention. Oh Jesus, anything."
And of course the conversation quickly turned to kids with Renee, which thankfully isn't happening anytime soon.
He told 36 told BANG Showbiz: "Oh gosh no, I'm just enjoying my life at the moment."
I'm sure he's happy with Renee and all, but when you're as hot as Bradley Cooper, you need to just stay single. He's out of her league anyway, so it's only fair to the rest of the women in the world that he stays single. Community property. Yummy community property.
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