Reese Witherspoon is a Drunk, Nicole Kidman is a Klepto

January 25, 2013 By:
Reese Witherspoon is a Drunk, Nicole Kidman is a Klepto
Image By: ABC

Yesterday, a strange thing happened. Matt Damon took over "Jimmy Kimmel Live." Meaning, Matt Damon tied Jimmy Kimmel to a chair and hosted the entire show which included **celebrity** appearances from Gary Oldman (uhhh?), Sheryl Crowe (wuddup 1990’s), Amy Adams (sure), Demi Moore (really?), Nicole Kidman (ok) and Reese Witherspoon (why not?).

The only exciting thing to emerge from this episode is that Nicole Kidman gives weird lap dances and is a klepto and Reese Witherspoon is a drunk.

Nicole walks onstage before stopping to give a tied-up Jimmy a very brief lap dance. Sounds erotic? Not at all. It was more like a “1,2,3 thrust” rather than a strip tease, but whatever, I’m no expert.

Then, she sits down for the interview (conducted by Matt Damon, by the way) and reveals that she’s a kleptomaniac! She steals spoons!

Ok so that happened, then Reese Witherspoon is wandering around the streets outside Kimmel’s studio carrying bags of alcohol? She’s all like, “Oh, I was just at BevMo.”

Then she comes inside the studio and in a totally choreographed bit, shows off her variety of booze.

It’s arguably the weirdest thing I’ve seen on TV in a long time. You've got to see it to believe it.