Paris Hilton Has Just Hit Peak Levels of White Girl

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Paris Hilton Has Just Hit Peak Levels of White Girl
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Paris Hilton reached a new summit for white girls everywhere with the music video for her new single “Come Alive.” Within a mere four minutes, Paris manages to squeeze in a glittery, sparkly cornucopia of stuff that white girls just “die” and “can’t” for. Let us count the ways.

1. She’s frolicking in a meadow.

E!

White girls love meadows.

 

2. She’s wearing angel wings.

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White girls lurrrv angel wings.

 

3. She’s on a flower swing.

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White girls love to be swinging in a bouquet of flowers.

 

4. She got her flower crown game on.

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White girls got stacks on stacks on stacks of flower crowns.

 

5. She sings the lyric: “I’ll be your princess.”

E!

White girls are the most obsessed with princesses.

 

6. She lifts her hands up over her head a lot.

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White girls love to lift their hands up over their heads.

 

7. Like A LOT.

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They just love it A LOT.

 

8. She flaunts her sparkly nail art.

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White girls be getting those bejeweled manis for us all.

 

9. She’s got five cans of too much pageant hair mousse in her hair.

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White girls love topping up their heads like it’s “Toddlers & Tiaras.”

 

10. She’s standing under a rainbow.

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White girls love rainbows.

 

11. She’s petting a unicorn.

E!

White girls love imagining they’re on a Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper.

 

Watch the whole video here if this is your kinda jam:

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