Listen up! Neal Schon, the Journey rocker who is banging Michaele Salahi, just emailed a picture of his penis to her soon-to-be ex husband. And it wasn't on accident! It was a legit bro-to-bro penis pic.
This is like revenge sexting, like "Hay buddy, look at what your wife is hanging out with now! Jealous?" This is so weird, what dude sends a pic of his dick to another dude? Huh?
Okay, we found out that Tareq Salahi is going to divorce his cheating wife Michaele Salahi, who is not kidnapped but totally just the world's most successful Journey groupie. TMZ has obtained copies of the divorce paperwork.
Tareq is citing adultery and abandonment as the recent for the divorce, but it's his lengthy description about his ridiculous wife that really packs on the lols.
"She continually exposes our friends and acquaintances to her adulterous relationship and has flaunted the same throughout the community, the nation and indeed the world, and thus caused me to suffer great harm, humiliation and embarrassment," Tareq describes in the document.
I love the building-suspense of "community, the nation and indeed the world." Is he describing his wife or the movie "Contagion."
But the best part is when he describes the penis photo. "The paramour [Neal] sent to my email account...a email with an attachment of a penis." Wait, wait, wait, an actual penis or a photo of one? Hey, inquiring minds want to know. Also lols at the word "paramour." Haha what's that?
The couple does have a pre-nup. I wonder if Michaele will walk with nothing, not like it matters, her paramour can probably pad her wallet.
Actually he does, Tareq claims, "I also understand that his rock band JOURNEY, paid for her travel, accommodations and other expenses."
Wait a minute, all that money I poured into buying all those Journey Greatest Hits albums are being used to pay for Michaele's travel accommodations!!! Never! Who am I kidding, I don't listen to Journey, because I'm not 55!
Tareq also says that he thinks Schon was a "former boyfriend" of Michaele's and that she had been hooking up with the rocker "for a period of months."
Tareq also attached to the official divorce paperwork, photocopies of TMZ stories that broke the news of the affair to the tabloids.
Hahah, because TMZ is a legitimate news source.
Apparently, Neal and Michaele met in 1995 and she married Tareq in 2003, so she and Neal had to keep their friendship on the down low because their sexual tension was bursting at the seams, or whatever.