Ever seen an A list celebrity traveling alone? No. It doesn't happen, celebs only travel in packs comprised of assistants, body guards, stylists, trainers, agents, managers, dog walkers, ass wipers, hair brushers, and food tasters. Some celebs travel with the most ridiculous entourages, such as assistants whose only job is to wipe sweat from someone's brow. This is true, keep scrolling.
However, don't be confused by wannabe celebs who gather a group of minions to give they illusion that they are more famous than they actually are. (I'm looking at you Miley Cyrus...your mom and your dog isn't a true entourage!)
While shows like "Entourage" depict a group of hanger-ons who sleep with beautiful women and go to fabulous parties simply because they associate with a celeb. In real life, celeb entourages are not that glamorous, here are the most ridiculous celebrity entourages ever.
Cee Lo Green: I thought Cee Lo was a chill low-key guy, but apparently he has two assistants with highly specific uhmm job descriptions, "He had someone wipe the sweat from his brow, as well as put a piece of gum in his mouth," says an onlooker at his album release party last November. Couldn't he get one guy to do both functions? What, did one guy major in Gum-to-mouth but wasn't trained in sweat removal? Give me a break.
Mariah Carey: Everyone knows Mariah's a diva but did you know that she has an assistant whose only job is to walk in front of her backwards in case Mariah trips and falls forward. She has another assistant whose job is to carry around luxurious toiler paper in case Mariah frequents a bathroom with less that satisfactory toilet paper. She has another assistant who hands her towels when she gets too sweaty. She also has a drink lifting specialist who sits next to Mariah and periodically lifts a cup to her mouth so she can drink. Did I mention that Mariah Carey does not have any arms anymore?
Ludacris: Ludacris travels with a large entourage and one of his elite crew members’ only job is to change batteries. Ludacris has a disease where he can’t touch batteries you guys. Kidding. Omigod this is the dumbest entourage member ever. When someone asked what he did the guy responded, "I do the batteries," and then he added that he was particularly responsible for replacing the batteries in Ludacris' Gameboy. Stopppp. What does this guy write on his resume, "Ludacris' battery putter-inner"?
P.Diddy: Diddy has as many assistants as the number of times he's changed his name. He never travels without his crew of body guards, professional associates and even his barber, but the most famous member of his entourage was Fonzworth Bentley. Bentley started his career as Diddy's umbrella holder. Yep, he just carried the umbrella. Somehow he turned from entourage member to full fledged celeb. He has appeared in music videos for Kanye West and Outkast and hosted the MTV series "From G's to Gents."
Lady Gaga: Gaga has an official entourage, it's her Haus of Gaga which is basically her collective of designers, dancers, writers and producers but when she appeared on the BBC show the "Graham Norton Show" a source said "There were about 80 hangers-on." 80? I though 5-10 was a huge entourage, but 80! Also, the huge entourage completely took over the show's cafeteria and ate all the bacon. Hahah ok? Apparently Gaga travels with a crew of highly specific bacon carnivores.