Like the jock quarterback bragging about his high school passing stats even though he still works at the local Home Depot, Ray J released the music video for “I Hit It First,” his new single blatantly about Kim Kardashian.
Ray J can deny it’s about their past tryst all he wants, but we’d prefer if he’d speed it along while he’s ringing up the light bulbs we’re trying to purchase, because it's still morning and we have other things to write about.
If the lyrics only breached the surface, then the visuals accompanying them dive deep into the Ray J-Kim K greeting card sex tape that enveloped and developed the Kardashians to the E! network and our home addresses. He slams the reality star—and no, it's not in the way you're thinking...
Ray J soaks up the attention by casting a Kardashian look-alike in the video—slicked back ponytail, bodycon dresses, black-and-white ensembles and all—for his newfound 3 minutes and 39 seconds of “relevancy” (3:39 is how long the video runs).
Throughout it we get knocked over the head with a “Kim K” hologram posing on a bed, waltzing onto a private jet, and blinking up at the frame of a home video camera. Kourtney and Khloe look-alikes also make a surprise appearance, in case you fell asleep from boredom and still didn’t get what Ray J’s going on and on and on—*checking our wristwatches*—and on about here.
The video ends with a knowing look at the camera from Ray J himself as he watches his co-star on cable television. Breaking the fourth wall? Who knew Ray J was such an inspired film director? A contemporary Jean-Luc Godard if we ever saw one.
Ray J can rap “I gave her that really bomb sex” all he wants, but it doesn’t cover up his bitterness. He made not just an ex-girlfriend, but her entire family multi-millionaires with a blasé sex tape and now she has more money than he himself could even fathom. IRONIC, RITE?