Kim Kardashian: My Fairytale Divorce

October 31, 2011 By:
Kim Kardashian: My Fairytale Divorce

After a marriage that only lasted two months, Kim Kardashian has filed for divorce from Kris Humphries this morning. Less than a few hours later and she's already released an official statement to E! News. Stay tuned and they'll probably start filming for Kim's Fairtytale Divorce this evening.

They are citing "irreconcilable differences" as the reason for the split, but really they should call it a "casting error." Kris Humphries was never right for the "husband" part to begin with.

Kim released this statement as the reason for ending her marriage:

"After careful consideration, I have decided to end my marriage. I hope everyone understands this was not an easy decision. I had hoped this marriage was forever, but sometimes things don't work out as planned. We remain friends and wish each other the best," says Kim.

That's it? After all that build up and all those references to The Royal Wedding and she ends it with "we wish each other the best?"

Kim Kardashian

Were the Midori and QuickTrim endorsements not making her famous enough? Was an elaborate and fake marriage really the only option to acheive Kardashian levels of fame? I guess when you're not a real actress, have already released a sex tape and have to compete with your sisters for prime E! facetime, that leaves you with few options. Start lining up the basketball players, Kim K needs a pay day.

Kim is not seeking any spousal support and she has asked that the terms of the pre-nuptial agreement be upheld. However, the reality TV star added a special "jewelry clause" to the pre-nup that says "miscellaneous jewelry and other personal effects" as well as "earrings and accumulations" gained by Kim before, during and after her marriage be confirmed as separate property. I wonder if that includes the $2 million wedding ring?

Additionally, Kim and Kris are going dutch on divorce bills, she's requested that each party pay their own court fees.

The E! Network released a statement where they pretend like they feel bad about the biggest PR stunt in the history of reality TV.

"All of us at E! are surprised and saddened by this news, and we send our support to Kim and Kris at this difficult time. The Kardashians have always been uniquely open with all aspects of their lives from joyous events to intimate moments to heartbreaking transitions. E! will continue to share the fascinating real lives and larger-than-life existence of this close-knit family."

Like I said, production on Kim's Fairytale Divorce probably starts tonight. It's the scene where Khloe says "I told you so" and then Kris H grumbles something that sounds like English and then Kim wears a blazer and tries to cry.