If 1970's Bruce Jenner could see reality star Bruce Jenner today he would likely either scream, cry, or simply gouge his eyes out with the closest javelin he could find.
At a fans event at the Parx Casino in Bensalem, Pennsylvania, modern day Mr. Jenner posed with a Wheaties box poster from the past. And, aside from the fact that he was still a white man, old and new Jenner were about as similar as Mickey Mouse and Marilyn Manson.
There on the orange box art, was 20-something Jenner racing to the finish line. The photo captures the star in mid-stride, long hair blowing in the wind with his muscles bulging. He looks handsome… Heroic.
And then there’s 62-year-old Jenner in an orange Wheaties polo pointing at the image as if to say, “What the f**k happened?”
Now, I’m not talking about the age gap between the two different Jenner versions. Obviously, a forty year difference is enough for any person to get nostalgic for their former self.
I’m talking about the plastic looking Jenner who unrealistically believes he can still be his 20-something self.
In 2009, Bruce’s stepdaughter Kim Kardashian admitted that he had undergone work on both his face and nose in the 1980's. Unfortunately, he didn’t like the first go-around.
"Since he’s turning 60 in October,” she said. “Bruce felt it was time to correct the mistakes made by the previous doctor so he went to a new doctor for a second facelift."
The result? A carved out, “softer” jaw line, painfully tight skin and a nose sharp enough to be considered lethal.
Yes, the older/younger Bruce pairing confirms that there’s no such thing as aging with grace for the Kardashian clan. There’s simply persistent denial, and then crashing and burning.