15 Things Kanye West Could Be Saying in This Photo

June 12, 2014 By:
15 Things Kanye West Could Be Saying in This Photo
Image By: Instagram

This photo was taken moments after Kim Kardashian and Kanye West ended their wedding ceremony and it's the weirdest and most distressing post-wedding photo of all time.

What could Kanye West possibly be saying to his in-laws that would make them look back at him like this?

“Can anyone explain to me why Blac Chyna’s booty is LARGER than Kim’s booty on her own damn wedding day?! HAAAN!?"

“Khloe, Imma let you finish, but ME AND KIM JUST HAD ONE OF THE BEST WEDDINGS OF ALL TIME!”

“I understand what PERFECT is because I made My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy, but this wedding will go down in history as texturally groundbreaking art that will redefine THE CULCHA!”

“Why am I getting a call from Ryan mothereffing Seacrest at 4 a.m. the night before my wedding? HAAN?!”

“I know what you’re all thinking, this wedding was the work of a creative genius…”

“I know you’re all very upset that Beyoncé and Jay Z didn’t come and now I know WHY they aren’t here…they hate Kourtney Kardashian [takes picture]. Just kidding, they don’t, that’s a joke. Carry on.”

“Joe Francis and Brittny Gastineau are filming an explicit topless video in the fountain out back.”

“The golden statues that I had custom created in my own image that were standing by the bar have been vandalized. I can only assume Jaden Smith is to blame.”

“Khloe, no disrespect, but French Montana’s song “Ocho Cinco” is the wackest thing I have ever heard in my entire life.”

“Who requested that the DJ play a Macklemore song? HAAN?!”

“I’m here to break the pavement, I’m here to cover new ground. So can anyone explain to me why LaLa Anthony showed up TO MY WEDDING in a Herve Leger wrap dress?!”

“The fact that you placed Balmain designer Olivier Rousteing at the same table as Jonathan Cheban is enough for me to cancel this entire wedding!”

“Rob Kardashian didn’t go home, he had a layover in Milwaukee.”

“Does anyone know why Bruce Jenner’s hair was not on brand?”

“I am a GOD.”