What’s In Store for the Shore? A Preview of ‘Jersey Shore’ Season 5

January 5, 2012 By:
What’s In Store for the Shore? A Preview of ‘Jersey Shore’ Season 5

God help us, Jersdays are back.

I can’t believe it’s that time again. Time for me to tell people I have “so much work to do” on Thursday nights and later deny to friends any knowledge of who Deena Cortese is.

Jersey Shore is returning to MTV Thursday nights, now in it’s fifth season. The cast members have all returned to New Jersey, fresh off of their season 4 excursion to Italy.

Last season’s drama mostly involved Mike “The Situation”, who seemed to alienate everyone in the house. So much so, that it made him run his head into a wall. Literally. He ran his head into a concrete wall and then passed out on the floor. That explains so much.

So what can we expect from this season? Well, despite her throwing a bottle of unidentifiable liquid at The Situation in the trailer, Snooki might have calmed down. Now that she’s been in a long-term relationship with an actual person and not a bottle of Jim Beam, Snooki may finally be domesticated.

"Now that I have a boyfriend and I'm in love and I'm 24, I only have a couple of glasses of wine once a week,” Snooki recently told Ellen DeGeneres. “It's kind of like, I've matured,” she continued.

Great. What are we going to watch now? Is it gonna be 40 minutes of Snooki reading a Raymond Chandler novel? You get back in those bars and put down those shots, Snooki!

Pauly Delvecchio, aka Pauly D, discussed the show’s return, too, saying that’s it’s nothing but partying.

"It was non-stop," Pauly said. "I think we hit it harder than we ever have this season because we were so glad to be home."

At some point, Vinny decides to leave the house during season 5.

“I just felt like I needed a break in order to feel good and healthy,” Vinny says. “I end up returning to the house, but you’ll see how it plays out."

If no one gets arrested, punched, or passes out in a puddle of their own vomit, I’m going to be pissed.

Check out the season 5 premiere below: