Clash of the "American Idol" gladiators.
And, no, we’re not talking about the contestants in this case (Does "Idol" still have those? Contestants?), nor is it between judge Nicki Minaj and whoever made eye contact with her on set that day.
This one includes Mariah Carey and someone from "Idol" past…
Turn back to page 44 in your U.S. Singing Competition History textbooks, America. It involves last season’s judge Jennifer Lopez.
With the TV show’s ratings nowhere near what they used to be, sources behind-the-scenes tell The Hollywood Reporter that producers and Fox executives had “hatched a dramatic plan to jumpstart the show”: replace M.C. with J.Lo.
LOL, OK, TRY TO GET THAT ONE PAST MARIAH CAREY, NO REALLY, TRY, WE'LL WAIT.
FOX didn’t get the Mariah Memo that was cc'ed to the Universe's inbox, apparently, because the only one who emancipates Mimi is Mimi herself.
Instead they got a threat of litigation.
When the diva caught word that producers were trying to send a Trojan Horse filled with an army of Jennifer Lopezes through Mariah’s palace gates, she was quick to respond with potential court action.
As swiftly as that, the “secret plot” to infiltrate the cell of judges on "American Idol" soil was abandoned.
Thankfully this didn’t happen, if only because the response from Mariah’s fanbase would have been bone-chilling. The lambs are screaming. Make the lambs stop screaming!
A spokesperson from FOX and everyone in its Hollywood Pentagon is denying the reports, chalking it up as “just another ridiculous 'Idol' judge rumor,” blown out of proportion by the ongoing “talks of Jennifer performing on the finale.”
The same way they chalked up an outline of Mariah’s body on the pavement of the judges’ panel.