Justin parked his BMW motorcycle outside Jennifer Aniston’s West Village apartment on Thursday morning. A neighbor then saw “what clearly was bologna” covered all over the bike. According to The New York Post, the bologna was cleaned off shortly after.
First of all, I know what you’re thinking, and yes, this is news. We got tired of Twitter stalking Ashton and Demi, okay?
No one knows who the prankster is, but the neighbor claims there were up to “25 slices” of meat covering the bike. Go ahead, take a minute to let that sink in.
“I got the impression it was some weird message, like, ‘You’re full of bologna’,” The neighbor revealed. Someone was peeking out of their window and thinking about this way too long. “The bike was in otherwise fine condition.”
Aniston's rep addressed the bologna scandal, saying: “There are paparazzi outside their apartment 24/7. Don’t you think they would have photographed the person doing it, if indeed this actually happened, which I do not know for sure.”
So this prank remains a mystery, for now at least. We may never know what really happened. But Theroux is certainly not the first celeb to get vandalized by a stranger.
In 2009, when she moved into a new neighborhood, Nadya Suleman, better known as Octomom, was welcomed by having her house completely covered in toilet paper.
Back in July, a fan threw eggs at Lady Gaga, reportedly because they didn’t appreciate her performing in a wheelchair. While the eggs didn’t hit Gaga herself, they did land on some members of her entourage.
When Sienna Miller had an affair with Balthazar Getty, her North London home was tagged with the word…well, I don’t even want to say it. Let’s just say it starts with an S and rhymes with, alright, it’s slut. Dammit, it’s Friday, I’m tired.
In 2010, someone egged Dina Lohan’s Long Island home. The Nassau County Police said the home was pelted with eggs and dirt bombs. Her mailbox was also ripped out of the ground a few weeks later. But I'm not completely convinced Lindsay didn't just run it over in a drunken stupor.
David Letterman’s studio was vandalized back in July. Luckily, they found and arrested the guy. CBS released a statement about the incident:
“We were notified that NYPD apprehended an intruder who gained access and vandalized the lobby of the Ed Sullivan Theater this morning.”
The guy broke a metal bar outside the studio to gain access, then broke some glass panels and doors and knocked down a bunch of garbage buckets.
All that stuff doesn’t make bologna seem that bad.