Javier Bardem is one of the sexist men alive, so it comes as no surprise that Esquire magazine chose him as their October cover boy.

Javier, who is expecting a baby with his gorgeous new bride Penelope Cruz talks to Esquire about why he thinks he's dying (he's a hypochondriac), why he's fascinated with doctors, and why he's not a celebrity. Here are some highlights from the interview:

Javier on being a hypochondriac: "I used to be a hypochondriac, but I was a young man then," he says. "Now I really am sick."

Javier on doctors: "These are the guys you should be writing about," Bardem says, nodding at the doctors. "They should be on the cover of your magazine. They save lives. I only make movies. The world is a funny place. It doesn't make any sense."

On being an actor, not a celebrity: "I have to believe in what I'm doing, otherwise I don't stand a chance."

On seeing Mexican director Alejandro González Iñárritu's debut English-language film, 21 Grams: "I remember, I almost got hit by a car walking out after," he says. "I was so moved by it. I wasn't right for a week." So Bardem was eager when he was offered the lead role in Iñárritu's Biutiful. "They are only movies," he says, "but I want to make movies that count for something."

On his new movie Biutiful:"I think it's a masterpiece," he said, "and it needs help."

For more on Javier, make sure to pick up the October issue of Esquire, out on newsstands soon!