Ladies, stop whatever it is you're doing. George Clooney is talking about orgasms.
In the upcoming issue of Rolling Stone, George Clooney does something very un-George Clooney-like. He talks about his personal life.
Clooney discusses his latest love, former WWE star Stacy Keibler. Specifically, he responds to a question about all her gushy Tweets.
"She can do whatever she wants," Clooney says. "I rarely tell anybody what they should be doing with their life."
Only George can express complete indifference toward his girlfriends and still have women waiting in line to ride the Clooney train to bang town.
Speaking of banging, the actor gave some details about his sex life, too, saying that he lost his virginity at the age of 16. And he feels it was "young, very young, too young."
And then there was his first orgasm. His partner? A rope.
"I believe it was while climbing a rope when I was six or seven years old," the Oscar winner says. "I mean, nothing came out, but all the other elements were there. I remember getting to the top of the rope, hanging off the rope, and going, 'Oh, my God, this feels great!'"
I wonder if the relationship lasted long.
George Clooney might be one of the most suave bachelors in Hollywood, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t enjoy a good fart joke. Actually, he loves a good fart joke.
"Even the idea of a fart makes me laugh," Clooney told the mag. "Saying the word 'fart' makes me laugh."
In fact, he enjoys farts so much; he's even got an app for it.
"I have iFart on my phone," he says. Siri, make butt noises.
Clooney continues: "I have remote whoopee cushions. Farts. To me, there's nothing funnier."
There you have it, ladies. The key to George Clooney's heart. Flatulence.
The word "Johnson" also makes him laugh.
"Always," Clooney said.
And celebrity isn't something Clooney only experienced in his later years. He was actually a local celebrity as a child. His father was a TV anchor in Ohio and Kentucky.
"You have to remember that in the microcosm of Cincinnati, Ohio through northern Kentucky, my father was a big, big star. So that made my sister and me really visible," Clooney explains. "Everybody knew us, talked about us. If I scored 15 points in a basketball game, the paper would say 'Nick Clooney's son scored 15 points.'"
It was a difficult time for Clooney, who struggled with Bell's palsy, a form of facial paralysis.
"It was very awkward, being watched like that, everybody looking at us, and then all of a sudden your face goes flat? My dad would always say, 'It's going to go away, you'll be fine, you can handle it." But it was a tricky thing. So, you develop a better personality and learn how to make jokes about it."