Jackson Family Stunned Diana Ross Didn't Attend Memorial

Image by Splash News

Michael Jackson's family members were stunned that his close friend Diana Ross didn't attend his memorial, and instead had someone else speak on her behalf.

Ross, who was appointed guardian of Michael's three children in the event of his mother Katherine’s death, decided not to attend his public memorial and instead sent a letter, which was read out by Smokey Robinson.

In her defense Diana said it just felt "right" not to attend but “When Smokey read out Diana’s letter, there were a lot of people’s heads turning and shrugging in those front rows,” said a source.

The letter that Smokey was asked to read said, "I am trying to find closure, I want you to know that even though I am not there at the Staples Center, I am there in my heart. I have decided to pause and be silent. This feels right for me. Michael was a personal love of mine, a treasured part of my world, part of the fabric of my life in a way that I can't seem to find words to express.

"Michael wanted me to be there for his children, and I will be there if ever they need me. I hope today brings closure for all those who loved him. Thank you Katherine and Joe for sharing your son with the world and with me, I send my love and condolences to the Jackson family."

Her letter to Michael did seem very genuine and heartfelt, but do you think she should have put her personal feelings aside and made it out to the memorial to pay her last respects?

Michael's longtime friend Elizabeth Taylor also skipped out on the memorial claiming she didn't want to be involved in the "hoopla." What are your thoughts on his closest friends being a no-show?

Diana Ross , Michael Jackson

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Reader Comments

0:52AM 09/04/09 faith527

Oh, and one more thing. Maybe some people can't take funerals, but when your mother and father dies do you go to the funeral? Hell yes! What is worse than that? Michael gave her the "red carpet ok" to raise his children. She should have gotten her boney ass on a plane. Period!

0:47AM 09/04/09 faith527

When I say something to relax I mean pills. Both of them are either addicted to pills themselves and/or drink heavily. Money

Proof that Money can't solve all problems.

0:38AM 09/04/09 faith527

in response to (11:49AM 07/08/09 ktygirl) you have it right!! I have been wondering about Diana and Liz ever since Mike died. I believe both of them at some time or another gave him something to relax. I also believe, get ready.... Michael Jackson was the one molested as a child so as protection for other boys his attempt to protect them landed him being called the molester. I believe that he loved(romantically) Diana Ross. I believe that they had a sexal encounter when he was younger than 18 and he never got over it. I do believe he knew what he was doing but his age still made it statutory. My children say that I'm a detective by nature and I have never been wrong. I bet I will get slammed by alot of bloggers but I'm ready. I love Michael Jackson and would have had children for him at the drop of a hat for no money. Well he would have had to pay the dr bills. Rest in peace my King!!

9:45AM 08/28/09 suzikid

I also feel the same with Liz Taylor exactly where was thier friendship on the day of his memorial? its very sad indeed that she couldnt see her way there

9:35AM 08/28/09 suzikid

I think its the ultimate betrayel to entrust your children to a person that could not be there for them at the time of thier fathers death. I think its humiliating for Micheal and his family that he thought so much of a person that could not be there for him

11:38AM 08/11/09 benbush

still today i am unable to listen to one of michael songs without becoming emotional of his passing, i'm 51 so i grew up with mike. If anybody should have been there is mz. ross, i beleave that she did not want any focus on her.

4:07PM 07/31/09 Asiacnh

For those who don't know....Diana Ross DID attend Michael Jackson's funeral....but she didn't attend the memorial....I wouldn't have myself...it was just another way for some to make money off of him again....It is so sad that some people can always bring the bad out of every situation..... Talking bad about someone... when they are hurting is not a very nice thing to do...That is why Michael is where he is today....Now that he is no longer with us...people want to talk good about him...What about when he was here....This world is so messed up....What? Are we trying to kill all the stars we have here...Like Mike said..."look at the man in the mirror"...." We as people...have to make that change....And, I am not trying to get anyone upset...I know we are all human and we all make mistakes...in life...

10:45AM 07/16/09 Beverley

It saddens me, that someone he thought so much of could be that cold and impersonal as to not even attended his funeral. Ms. Ross seems to be sending a message that she does not want his children or to be too closely linked to Michael.

2:15AM 07/10/09 Serenity

In my opinion certain stars didn't attend b/c they thought the service was going to be tacky & distasteful. But I'm sure when they saw how beautiful & appropriate the service was-they felt stupid! Im sure some people may have valid reasons for thier abscence, but saying that their "full of grief" & those types of things are excuses.I am sure his family is absolutely torn apart about his passing, but they pulled themselves together for him & his kids. No matter how sad or hurt his "so-called" were, they shouldve came out to support Michael & his family. This has changed my opinion about certain celebrities.

0:24AM 07/10/09 honestly

I suspect that there was some type of falling out that Diana Ross had with Michael, as with many of his celebrity friends I believe that they wanted to distance themselves from him after he was accused of child molestation. and a Senate resolution to honor Michael Jackson for his charitable work. was shut down after little to no congressional or senate support due to the controversy surrounding his personal life.

3:22PM 07/09/09 SharonByrn

I do not agree that some people cant deal with grief and sadness. Better learn to deal with it, these things come to all of us sooner or later. Just look at how many people dealt with it who attended his memorial. I agree with others on here who say "excuses, excuses!

3:16PM 07/09/09 SharonByrn

This was a very nice memorial, not a funeral. I dont know any excuse good enough for Liz Taylor or Diana Ross for not attending. They have always claimed to have loved Michael. As far as Lisa Marie goes, she too should have been there to pay respects to the family.

1:13PM 07/09/09 fjigifted

Excuses, Excuses! people attend funerals of those who they really love. They want to see them just that one last time. I hate funerals and avoid them; but, if it's someone I really love and care for, I AM THERE. Mainly supporting their grieving family, because of my love for them. Ross, Taylor, Presley are all arrogant, stuck up women who are concern about themselves. That's what Michael was attracted to, women who had the bitch syndrome going on. Unfortunately it showed off more at the most inopportune time. They really should be ashamed of themselvs. And Quincy?? As much money he made off of Michael.He need to quit that "it's too much" crap. THEY WERE WRONG and dishonored MJ and his family with such decisions.

4:07AM 07/09/09 Tameeky

She was a big part of his life and I am Sure she probably just could not take the Emotional part of being there. Having her words read in the Letter was a good thing to do. Liza M. should have done the same. I am sure she also had Personally paid her Respects to the family.

1:26AM 07/09/09 talibaho

Diana should have attended the private funeral at least. I've a feeling that perhaps she didn't really care for Michael as much as he cared for her. I wonder if he asked her first about caring for the children. I always that she was too much of a diva and thought too much of herself.

9:20PM 07/08/09 miley4ever

she just couldnt be there, it was too much for her

4:21PM 07/08/09 kittyunknown

While i can understand why Diana Ross may not have wanted to sing or speak at Michael's memorial, I do NOT understand why she wouldn't at least attend to fulfill and RESPECT his last request of her, to support his CHILDREN. I feel her decision not to even attend was very selfish and self centered.

3:43PM 07/08/09 DoraBelle

i felt so bad for michael..spec when i didnt see Diana, Liz, Quincy or Lisa Marie Presley there:s???i dont understand???.it was michael jacksons memorial.

3:39PM 07/08/09 Dolce

we all cried ours eyes out and yet we didn't even knew him personaly, imagine if u r that close and had to go viewing and seeing him dead how horrible would have felt, I don't blame them at all not attending the funeral.

2:06PM 07/08/09 sandra42

I cannot judge either Diana or Liz but I will say this, I take funerals very hard and sometimes it's embarrassing when someone cries out repeatedly as I have at funerals and in some cases it was a funeral of someone I didn't know where I attended but knew of. It was all the sadness and grief around me that always reduces me to cries out loud and a pool of tears. Honestly I understand when someone would not show if they are so grief stricken. I just can't find it in my heart not to show for someone I love unless the getting there caused some undue strain in some way. I will always respect anyone who will go with what their gut instinct tells them or what their heart feels the most certain of. As far as Liz I actually thought she died till recently but am glad she is still alive. I couldn't imagine the strain it would put on her frail heart if she attended. I respect her decision. I'm sure she wants to live as long as she can and she's still fighting off death each day. As far as Diana, I truly believe some of her decision may be some shame for breaking his heart long ago and to explain that to the world with a coverup would've been devastating for her. In all honesty I believe her sent letter was the best she could do. Sorry if this offends anyone but that was in my heart so I had to post. RIP MJ I love you ETERNALLY!!!

2:03PM 07/08/09 cporter3

I try very hard not to judge anyone, but I have to say that I was VERY surprised to hear that Ms Ross would not be there. I mean, MJ left his kids, whom I do not think anyone can deny were MUCH loved, to her care in the event his mother couldn't care for them. I would have thought that she would be there for the family. It makes me wonder if MJ thought more of thier relationship than she did???

1:22PM 07/08/09 StarryEyes87

That's respectful! Some people can't stand funerals!

0:48PM 07/08/09 myholly787

I don't feel we are in the position to judge Diana and Liz. God knows how they truely feel in their hearts...and Michael certainly knows as well. Perhaps some who loved him most dearly thought that the memorial was too much of a circus...and some who didn't know him at all...showed up and performed for their own reasons and the publicity. We love you, Michael!

11:49AM 07/08/09 ktygirl

Could be any number of things...1. Personal grief process. 2. These women are getting old and are vain and don't want anyone to see them. 3. It was a memorial service not the red carpet. 4. I heard Ross wasn't going because of security problems...whatever that meant. 5. Their on drugs and can't cope.

11:12AM 07/08/09 tatiana

I agree that people grieve in their own ways. I have a friend who couldn't attend her own mothers funeral because she was so upset. None of her family was upset by that. They felt it was better she stay home then become even more upset by being there. As far as someone asking why weren't some other celebrities there. Just because Michael was alot of artists musical inspirtation didn't mean they were good friends with Michael. They probably watched his memorial at home on tv like alot of us did. There's no shame in not going to the memorial but in grieving in your own way. Even Quincy Jones didn't go.

10:59AM 07/08/09 Tweetybird

i signed up just so i could comment on this. I agree everybody grieves in their own way and to some showing up and facing it would be just to painful to bear, as it was for my sister when her bestfriend died, she didn't show up because she didn't want to remember him in that way..but out of respect and love i feel you should show up. You should be able to pull yourself together for atleast that evening. Althogh i know Elizabeth and Diana truly loved michael, its kind of a slap in the face in a way-for lack of better word. I know michael would have showed up had it been one of them. He would have spoken! So i think they should of regardless of what they say. The "hoopla" comment was a little cold. Hoopla? Its michael Jackson! to us it is, to you he was your good friend who you should be the one jumping to say he deserved every bit of this "hoopla" yesterday. This is like the ultimate show in friendship...to try your best and show up for a loved one who's life is now over..and you werent even there?

9:45AM 07/08/09 Chloe

I completely agree with Ella27...it only matters how you treat someone in life. After one dies, you can memorialize them all they want. Personally, the entire memorial saddened me because Michael wasn't there to see it. It would have been nicer if he knew how much everyone loved him BEFORE he died. Instead, he died in dept and obscurity. Diana Ross is famous and doesn't want to come across as these other celebs did...phony attention whores. What happened between her and Michael is their business. :-/

9:40AM 07/08/09 Ella27

It only matters what you do for somebody during their life. You shouldn't have to put on a show or make sure that you are seen at a memorial for everyone else's benefit.

9:37AM 07/08/09 robbinlea

I looked to me like a 3 ring circus, from what I saw. I wouldn't have wanted to attend either. Especially with that asshole Sharpton there. What a dick! The only genuine moments I saw were Brook Shields and his daughter.

9:07AM 07/08/09 girly987

hey.. people deal with grief in differeny ways. maybe putting things down on paper didnt "sound" genuine but who the hell are you to say that? Do you know Diana Ross and how she is feeling? I think not...

8:39AM 07/08/09 gretchens411

Her grief is NO bigger or deeper than that of his children and his family.It's selfish and self-centered of her to think it is. A TRUE friend would have been there.I understand that Liz Taylor wasn't there because she has been very ill herself.Michael wants Diana to possibly care for his children.She should have at least been there in support of them.If this is any indication of how she would "be there" for them,her first attempt has failed, dramatically!!

8:38AM 07/08/09 lindaj

I am not surprised. I think that Michael Jackson may have been a poor judge of character when he thought that Ross was an endearing friend. The lady has a notorious reputation and is unfit to raise anyone's children. I think that it was disgraceful that she did not attend. The family should be offended. Some bullshit letter, from her publicist does not cut it.

8:24AM 07/08/09 nolaRITA

I understand completely. Sometimes your grief is so deep and personal it's harder than anyone can imagine to bear, much less share with whole world. Especially Liz, she is so frail herself, I'm not sure she could handle the whole public display. It is really too much to even ask of her.

8:13AM 07/08/09 DoraBelle

was Chris Brown there???

8:12AM 07/08/09 DoraBelle

Why wasnt celebrities like Justin Timberlake, Britney Spears, Diana Ross,Madonna,Elisabeth Taylor,Quincy Jones, Lisa Marie Presley,Beyonce, Rihanna,P Diddy, Ne-yo Jay z R.Kelly there?

8:08AM 07/08/09 AJ1952Chats

My aunt's son listened to the service in church lobby instead of seeing her in her casket. Don't judge absentees.

8:02AM 07/08/09 coolguy

funerals are not for everyone...it is perfectly understandable.

8:00AM 07/08/09 maxie

People grieve in their own ways. Alot of people close to ones who have died don't even attend the funerals because it's just too hard on them. Diane and anyone else who didn't attend like Liz did what they needed to do to get through. People shouldn't be hard on them.

7:44AM 07/08/09 volar

she should have gone

6:56AM 07/08/09 soomaria

they had all the right to do that. memorial is just another show, he's dead – full stop.

6:49AM 07/08/09 gretchens411

SAD!!! Michaael was madly in love with her since he was a little boy.She SHOULD have been there!! Funerals are NOT easy for ANYONE!! Most especially his children and Michael"s mother. They found a way in their horrific grief to be there.You are supposed to put your own feelings aside for one day in respect for Michael's memory and for the loved ones he has left behind. I do consider it rude and distastful.

6:16AM 07/08/09 Eboe

Some people can't deal with the grief and sadness of a memorial/funeral. Lots of people just can't make themselves go. I wouldn't consider it rude.