David Beckham: I Don't Stuff My Underwear to Look Bigger

February 3, 2012 By:
David Beckham: I Don't Stuff My Underwear to Look Bigger

Who was accusing him!? Who says these mean things about David Beckham!? David Beckham is a god among men and everyone knows this!

Anyways, David Beckham is defending himself against the haters who think that he’s enhanced his manhood for all his various underwear shoots.

The hater in question is comedian James Corden, who parodied Beckham in a video by stuffing socks in his underwear.

Now, David is defending himself, “I’ve never, ever done a James and padded out my pants, or shoved socks down there though.”

“I’ve never had to for any of the photoshoots I’ve done because hopefully, I don’t need to,” says the soccer star, “Well, let’s just say I’ve been told I don’t need any help in that department. I think I’m pretty OK!”

Yeah, you guys, Beckham had an expert (Michael Fassbender) check him out in the nude and confirmed that Beckham doesn’t need any help in the padding department. “I, Michael Fassbender, star of “Shame” can confirm that David Beckham is all man.” – Michael Fassbender. I’m kidding.

Even though Beckham has graced the cover of many advertisements with his tighty whities and boxer briefs, he says his wife Victoria Beckham loves to see him in the very unsexy long johns.

“Victoria loves me in long johns. I like wearing the normal, short briefs but she reckons she likes me better wearing the long johns,” says Beckham.

Victoria likes him in long johns so much, so orders him to wear them and parade around the house for her.

“She makes me wear them around the house,” says Beckham, “But that’s OK because they’re comfortable and keep you warm.”

While we’re on the topic of underwear, Beckham says that he can’t walk around the house naked, like he used to, now that he has a baby girl.

“My naked days are over,” says Beckham, “I definitely walk around the house in my underwear. But not naked. With the boys it’s not a problem because they’re naked all the time but with a little girl now, it is different.”

I’m sorry, what is he talking about? I started daydreaming around “My naked days are over.”