Courtney Love has done a lot of things: been publically fondled, written several suicide notes to loved ones, showed off her track marks…but by god, she will not sit back and be called a “crackhead”.
"Kelly Osbourne and Joan Rivers called me a crackhead on the E! channel,” Courtney explained. “Kelly knows I'm sober. Kelly knows there's no drugs allowed at my house. I think it's really lame."
To be fair “crackhead” is one of those sayings you just throw around; it doesn’t mean you literally are one. It’s like saying, “do-chebag” or “assh-le” or “trainwreck,” all of which apply, by the way.
But Love took offense, primarily because she’s been there for Osbourne through her own addictions:
"This girl I know, Kelly Osbourne, I've saved her life twice," ranted Love. "I've done CPR, I've put things in her boobs. [She was on] Oxycontin, cocaine, foaming at the mouth."
So apparently Courtney Love played John Travolta to Kelly Osbourne’s Uma Thurman. But I’m sure the scene went down less like a cool Tarantino movie and more like a sad, low-budget Lifetime original. Love explained that Sharon Osbourne paid publicist Max Clifford hundreds of thousands of dollars to keep Kelly’s drug problem under wraps.
Which is a huge waste of money, because, I’ve always just assumed Kelly had a drug problem. It doesn’t matter whether she did or didn’t; her parents are Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne. There’s no amount of money that would’ve gotten me to believe she wasn’t a crackhead.