What Does It Take to Be a Hollywood 'Bad Boy'?

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What Does It Take to Be a Hollywood \'Bad Boy\'?
Cameron Diaz recently described her ex, Justin Timberlake, as a “bad boy.”

“He's great at making fun of himself,” Diaz said. “But if you're really a true nerd, you can't really make fun of yourself that way, you have to be aware of it. He's a bad boy."

Despite the fact that he likes to strike his badass pose—his chin down, eyes looking mischievously up at camera—Timberlake doesn’t strike me as a bad boy. He certainly has the bark—grabbing Mila Kunis’ breasts, being frank with interviewers, bragging about pot smoking—but he still comes off more Chihuahua than Pit Bull.

So then what exactly does it take to be a Hollywood Bad Boy? I’m so glad you asked.

A drug problem: Do a search on “Hollywood bad boys”, and nearly all of them that pop up are better known for their drug problems than anything else. Charlie Sheen, Colin Farrell, Robert Downey Jr.—they’ve all battled with drugs and/or alcohol. Maybe it’s the old idea about how women want to rescue a man, but come on, ladies. We have better things to do.

Carelessness: The word “rebel” is probably one of the first that comes to mind when thinking of a true Bad Boy. They don’t care about the rules, they live fast, love hard, and die young. Take John Mayer, for instance. Regarding interracial dating, Mayer has said, “My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I've got a Benetton heart and a f-ckin' David Duke c-ck. I'm going to start dating separately from my dick." He really, really doesn’t care what anyone thinks, as long as we think he doesn’t care. Unfortunately, that goes for his girlfriends, too.

Tons of sex partners: Believe it or not, the old haggard woman on American Idol used to be Steven Tyler, one of the baddest boys in Hollywood. Aside from the insurmountable number of groupies he’s been with, some highlights of Tyler’s career include: knocking up a fourteen year old, dating and/or marrying a couple of fashion models, and having his identity concealed from daughter Liv Tyler because her mom wanted to protect her from Tyler’s drug addiction. He’s said of his sexual exploits: “We didn’t compete, but we did share. And the crabs won.” His first sexual experience was “at the age of seven with twins.” Tyler suffered from Hepatitis C, a sexually transmitted disease. In fact, he’s had so many, STD actually stands for Steven Tyler Disease.

Rudeness: Rihanna sang about it, and it’s true: bad boys are very rude! And I don’t just mean belching and not saying “thank you”. Christian Bale comes to mind. Remember the whole “fuck’s sake, you’re an amateur!” rant? I’m pretty sure half the women on set dropped their pants during that shouting session.

Hypersensitivity: Let’s face it, bad boys have issues. They push that pain into the depths of their soul and then take it out by getting a tattoo. Take Robert Downey, Jr. for example. Robert has said things like, “I’m not used to feeling like I belong…” and “I’ve always felt like such an outsider”. If I didn’t know better, I’d think I was reading Miley Cyrus’ diary. Nowadays, Downey, Jr. has seemed to be a reformed bad boy. It’s about time.
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