The other day I was pulling up to the Ralphs parking lot, minding my own business, when I noticed a blonde haired girl that looked KIND OF FAMILIAR.
“Do I know her?” I wondered aloud to my friend.
My friend checked her out and was also like:
“She looks REALLY familiar.”
“Did we go to college with that girl?”
Then my friend goes, “OH MY GOD I KNOW WHO IT IS!”
“It’s BROOKE HOGAN!”
“Brooke Hogan? Like Hulk Hogan’s daughter?”
My friend: “Yahhh, the one and only.”
By now, Brooke and her friend were halfway through the store, and my friend and I were like:
I should mention that Brooke was wearing a gray hoodie, sweat pants, and UGG BOOTS in THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY.
Brooke was just pushing her cart like a regular person, and my friend and I were like:
Just spying on her like a couple of weirdos.
Did I mention this was “ROCK & ROLL RALPHS!”
A.K.A. the ONLY Ralphs in Hollywood to SEE and be SEEN!
It’s PACKED everyday at 3am after all the bars close and the Hollywood wannabees desperately search for Advil or more alcohol.
DON’T ACT SO SURPRISED TAYLOR SWIFT PEOPLE DRINK ALCOHOL IT’S A THING!
So where were we?
Oh yeah, Brooke Hogan.
She was buying coconut water or something, I can’t be sure.
It got REALLY boring.
My friend was like, “Is her mom still dating that teenager?”
And I, being the celebrity expert that I am, was like, “No, Linda Hogan broke up with Charlie Hill LIKE A THOUSAND YEARS AGO.”
Psh. Some people don’t know anything about celebrities.