Just when you thought we were finally done with this chapter, it turns out, there's more to the story.
Okay, you know why we can't get over this? We're all terrified Angelina Jolie is going to steal our boyfriends because we're too boring. There, I said it. As long as Brangelina is a thing, we're going to keep being appalled by it.
"She was annoyed," a friend of the actress's told Us Weekly. "She thought it was rude and inappropriate."
To recap, Brad Pitt said his penis got bored in his marriage and wanted something else. Also, he doesn't know how to functionally smoke weed.
An insider from Pitt's camp said that upon releasing the comments, Aniston's press team "went ballistic."
"They got his team involved and Brad was read the riot act—the only way you can read the riot act to Brad Pitt.”
A day later, Pitt released a statement saying that his words were misinterpreted.
"…I wasn't living an interesting life myself. I think that my marriage had something to do with it."
He added that Aniston is "an incredibly giving, loving and hilarious woman."
Okay, I'm not sure what the rules are for leaving your wife for Angelina Jolie, but I'm pretty sure it involves just shutting the hell up and never, ever mentioning your ex.
The Pitt source admits: "No one believes his words were taken out of context -- he said what he said. I do hear that he's remorseful."
And get this, the source adds, "We think he's jealous she's in love."
Well, I'm not sure about that one. But he's probably at least a little jealous of Aniston's freedom. You can't tell me that a dude with six kids doesn’t miss his days of doing nothing but smoking a joint on the couch.
Pitt recently appeared onThe Ellen DeGeneres Show, where he told Ellen:
"Yeah, did you ever see the movie [One Flew Over] the Cuckoo's Nest? That's morning time in our house."
And when it gets too crazy, how does Brad Pitt relax?
"It's called a hotel. You just, you gotta get outta the house. You gotta leave."
Oh, that's great advice to give the married men of America. Leave your wife with the kids and go check into a hotel. That should go over well.
And what about getting married? Will he and Angelina ever tie the knot?
"We live in this great country that is about freedoms, that's defined by our freedoms and equality, and yet, we allow this discrimination to go on every day. That's not what we're about, that's not what makes us great. And until that is reversed, I just don't get it. It make no sense to me," Pitt says. "I don’t know what the future holds."