By now you’ve seen the seven photos Beyoncé’s publicist tried to famously remove from the Internet after the Super Bowl. You probably still see them flash through your mind at random times, like a bad Vietnam War memory.
Now Beyoncé is taking that snafu into her own diva hands to solve this issue once and for all. She’s banishing professional photographers altogether from her KINGDOM concerts.
If there’s a force to take on something as omnipotent as The Impossibly Ever-Expanding Internet, it would be a godlike deity like Beyoncé.
For a recent string of concerts released from her Mrs. Carter World Tour, every photo credit reads “Photo by Frank Micelotta/Invision for Parkwood Entertainment/AP Images.”
If you’re considering the significance of this, then it’s your lucky day because in April 23rd's edition of “Ask a Beyoncé Expert,” we’re here to tell you that Parkwood Entertainment is the production company founded by none other than Beyoncé.
This means the only images available for the mainstream media to download were either directed to only take flawless photos and/or pre-approved by the singer because it’s her exclusive photographer-for-hire. Beyoncé’s been brushing up on her copy of The Prince because this is fiercely Machiavellian of her.
Print out all those bad photos, frame them at a Pictures Plus, hang them in a hallway, and relish in their rarity. Because if she has any say in the matter they’re the last seven uncomplimentary images your peasant vision will ever lay eyes on. No more un-Bey-coming photos.
She may have ancient Ottoman Empire levels of control, but it's not a totally fail-safe solution—she’s ultimately just a tyrant of her own image. Banning professional photographers won’t stop fans from snapping photos on their cell phones…for now. We don’t know what Beyoncé is truly capable of.