If you don’t keep up with the show, don’t worry. I watch it religiously. For you. Yup, sacrificing my brain cells for the greater good.
Amber Portwood, one of the moms from the MTV reality series, Teen Mom, has been thrown back in jail. She was originally arrested for punching the sh-t out of her baby daddy, Gary Shirley, and the whole ordeal was documented on camera.
Portwood was on probation for the incident, and she was required to complete anger management classes and obtain her GED. According to court records, Portwood did not go to the classes and didn’t get her GED, either. Which means she was literally arrested for being an idiot.
The revocation for Portwood’s probation was sought after she was accused of battery and public intoxication. Although to be fair, I’m not sure how you gauge when these Teen Mom stars are intoxicated. Because they pretty much just act like belligerent drunks all the time. Don't believe me? Here are a few quotes from the show:
“I am awake, you f-cking idiot.”
“High. High. You’re both HIGH! You’re nothin’ but a damn lyin’ hustler!"
“I was gonna go to Planet Fun.”
MTV knows how to pick 'em. The police report obtained said that Portwood was said to have become “a danger to herself and to society; therefore should be taken into custody.” What, is she gonna punch herself in the head, too?
The report cited her suicidal tendencies and abuse of prescription meds as the main reasons for he arrest. Portwood was supposed to meet with her probation officer on Friday. When two probation officers showed up at her house that day, she was allegedly under the influence of “a mood-altering substance.”
Are you sure she wasn’t just watching the new season of her show? Because fifty minutes of that sh-t will turn you into a zombie.
Amber refused to take a drug test that day and also on Monday. She was booked at Indiana’s Madison County jail, where she’s being held without bail. She’s due in court January 13.