Have you heard the news about Amber Heard and Johnny Depp? They’re reportedly engaged and our world is collapsing all around us with envy.
1. She’s engaged to Johnny Depp.
2. Repeat: She is engaged to Johnny Depp.
3. ENGAGED ENGAGED ENGAGED THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
4. Engaged, a synonym for “getting married.”
In case that wasn’t clear.
5. Johnny Depp plays Jack Sparrow and Amber Heard is engaged to him.
6. Any day now he’ll be saying “I do” and it won’t be to you.
7. It will be to herrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
And those are the diverse list of reasons why we’re jealous of Ms. Heard/Future Ms. Heard-Depp.