Amanda Bynes Weird Apology Over Offensive ‘Cancer’ Tweet

July 17, 2013 By:
Amanda Bynes Weird Apology Over Offensive ‘Cancer’ Tweet

Your head is about to break. Calm down and let us explain.

So, Amanda Bynes tweeted this super offensive tweet about cancer earlier this week:

Then, Amanda wrote in to “Vanity Fair” and apologized for the tweet in the most elegantly crafted apology statement we’ve ever read in the history of celebrity apology statements…or did she?

In an article on VF.com titled, “Amanda Bynes’ Most Offensive Tweet Yet Is a Simple Grammatical Mixup!” someone named “Amanda Bynes” unleashes a poetic flurry of words to describe why she compared herself to a cancer patient.

“I’m not a wretched person with zero sense of perspective or respect for fellow human beings; rather, the actual explanation of my statement is something far more banal. No, Arendtites, not “banal” as in “the banality of evil”—banal as in, this was a very stupid grammatical error,” says the supposed Amanda.

See what we mean as to why we're having a hard time believing the real Amanda wrote this? Amanda's tweets are vaguely even English, how did she write all that?

“Amanda” continues in “her” apology, “What I intended to say was ‘“not having hair makes me feel like a cancer: patient.” That is, waiting for my hair to grow has made me a more patient person.”

After some Google sleuthing we discovered that “Amanda,” or whoever the writer is behind the pen name, actually writes for VF on the regular, like this time “Amanda” explained why so many imposters live in NY or how she’s recording a “spoken word” album.

So, they may not be real, but they are actually more entertaining than the real Amanda spectacle, which is starting to feel like bad reruns of a show we didn't want to watch in the first place.